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I’m Practically a Gradu…Ooh Look at Those Bunnies!

May 1, 2009

So, I was just woken up by the sound of our first real summery time storm. The rain started pouring suddenly and swiftly and somewhere along the way in my life I became a light sleeper. And now I’m writing a post? There is something seriously wrong with me.

Anyway, as you may or may not know, I’m a procrastinator with a pretty bad case of easily distracted. I think they’d give it an acronym but since ED is already taken (Viva Viagra!) and could cause some serious confusion, we’ll just say that it’s like ADD for people who have never been tested and may or may not have been this way their whole lives. So the fact that last night (or this morning, depending on how you see it) at around 1:40 a.m. I finished my master’s project paper is a pretty big deal. This is a huge fete as it’s the sport management version of the thesis. I like to call it the Lazy Man’s Thesis, or LMT for short. I also like to dress it up and throw tea parties. I am Mrs. Nesbit!

These guys know how to have a good time!

Yes, that was an obscure reference to Toy Story. No, I am not ashamed.

See how I digress from the whole point of this post? Where were we? Right, the LMT is completed and I now only have two presentations standing in the way of becoming the proud holder of a Master’s of Science! What science was actually involved in me breezing through my classes for the last two years, just barely doing enough to secure a passing grade and bullshitting my way through the rest, is unclear. But I’ll take it.

If back when I was finishing up undergrad (in classic two years of senioritis fashion) someone had told me that three years later I’d be getting my master’s, I would have laughed in their face, called them a liar, and probably lit their pants on fire (note to self: try new party game entitled “don’t you lie to me!”; work on coming up with a better name for it). But now, here I am, on the cusp of leaving my second stint of post-secondary education for the “real world.”

You’re probably thinking, Cheddar, we’re very proud of you, but what’s your point? Hey! I don’t need a point if I don’t have one, thanks. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but I’m practically a master. A Master of Science. I’ve basically reached wizard status. Somebody fetch me my wand! Which reminds me, I’m going to need someone (cough, cough) to come up with a cool suffix for those of us who are too easily distracted to get doctorates to stick at the end of our names. I mean, go to law school, become an esquire! Go to medical school and become a doctor! Hell, you can even just become certified in any number of things and get some cool combo of letters after your name – RD, ATC, etc. I want a cool thing to put after my name that tells people I’m a sport management wizard. Get on it people.

I did actually have something meaningful to say. I think it was that, like most people, I’ve learned a LOT of things in my six years of college and most of them didn’t happen in the classroom. Whether that’s a sad statement on the education one can receive at our public research universities, or the point of going to college, I’m not sure. But I can say I’m thankful for the experiences and all the friends I’ve made while I was at it.

If I did learn anything important in college, it’s that the fates have aligned next week. Three historic events are coming together to create a day so earth-shatteringly awesome, I may have been practicing singing “I Feel the Earth Move” and/or choreographing a dance for use on this day.

I believe this guy sings. I need this.

I believe this guy sings. I need this.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009 marks my final master’s project presentation. This day is also Cinco de Mayo, which for some signifies a celebration of the Battle of Puebla and for others, a prime opportunity to where funny hats and finally get to the worm at the bottom of the bottle. Finally, it being Tuesday, it is also “Tequila Tuesday” at my favorite restaurant (aka place where everyone I know works), meaning they sell their many fine tequila shots for half price.

Basically, I am officially done with school on a night when even the people who don’t know what Cinco de Mayo means mainline tequila and attempt to speak Spanish that just so happens to coincide with cheap tequila night at my favorite restaurante? I’m going to call myself in drunk in advance for next Wednesday and start imbibing fluids now to stave off dehydration.

What? You’re right! Wizards have wands to take care of hangovers and by that time, I’ll be official. Psst, camarero! Una margarita mΓ‘s, por favor.

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