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AWOL – Avoiding Writing Out of Laziness?

June 1, 2009

Hi there, I’m Cheddar. I supposedly write this blog. I’m not going to make any excuses for not writing in way too long.

Oh, who am I kidding? I am definitely going to make excuses which you may choose to believe and accept or not. It’s not that I don’t enjoy regaling you with stories TMIs from my infamous past, whining about having no friends, gushing about being a blog nerd or posting pictures of hot footballers. It’s really more that I have been very lazy busy and, in my defense, I was actually away from a computer for a whole three days last week.

So, in lieu of a boring long post about my adventure out to the Left Coast for a job interview last week, I’ll just run down some of the highlights in a bulleted list so that y’all have something to complain about in the comment area. Here we go…

  • For my first ever big-girl job interview (there’d be a comma in the paycheck and everything!) I bought two suits because you’re supposed to “dress for the job you want, not the job you have” or some bullshit.
    • People in suits at my potential employer: 0
    • People in button down shirts at my potential employer: 3
    • People in flip flops: 3
    • Women with faux-hawks: 1
    • Search committee members in board/gym shorts: 2
    • Despite feeling slightly over-dressed, any place where they wear flip flops is a place I want to work
  • Male student on the campus may or may not have holla’d at me in my suit. It was sort of like this (but not really)
  • One of the search committee members told me he really enjoyed my “beer pong article” from my college paper. The “article” was actually a column about rain-outs and, while mentioning beer pong, was not limited to this subject. I like this place already
  • The same guy also said he manages the work-life balance problem in our industry by “drinking heavily.” Add that to the fact he enjoys the falafal drive thru in my hometown and it’s clear we were meant to work together or be best friends. Or both
  • Then again, he also told me three times that he thinks I’m a great writer. He obviously has never read this blog.
  • During the tour, I was introduced to a tiny, older, foreign man who said exactly two things to me:
    • “I am an American citizen”
    • “I have many girlfriends there.” (In reference to his trip to La Patria – Spain)
    • Well, I’ve always wanted a Spanish friend (see: hot footballers, Iker, Cesc, Espanish)
  • My brother took photos of me in my suit, doing a sassy pose and posted them on the internets.
  • I was reminded of how much I love Trader Joe’s. Not sure I can survive another span of my life without that store.
  • Dubs and 007 are two of my favorite people to mock people with. Which reminds me that we forgot to mock our waiter’s studded belt

After all that, I don’t know how I can not go work at this place. Hopefully I’ve convinced them they desperately need to hire me. Or at the very least, that I would do a better job than the other two candidates.

If all of the above points, along with the fact that I love the place, the people are awesome and I think it’d be a great place to work, haven’t convinced me that I should definitely get back to California ASAP, then the fact that I have heard “Birthday Sex,” “Kiss Me Through the Phone,” “Disturbia” and “Love In This Club” on the only hip-hop top-40 tolerable station in Knoxvegas while writing this post is the most damning evidence* that I need to get back to where I once belonged.

You’re right, it sounded better when Paul McCartney sang it. Apologies. Glad to be back people and I promise to do better.

* That and the creepy ice cream truck van that plays music and an eerie voice that says “Hello!” Uh, pedophile, party of 13 – 12 kids menus, please.

  1. June 2, 2009 1:00 pm

    B was away this weekend and, no joke, texted me “Kiss me through the phone” from the golf course.


  2. June 2, 2009 3:49 pm

    “I have many girlfriends here”

    WHAT kind of statement is that?LOL

  3. Cheddar permalink*
    June 2, 2009 3:52 pm

    LiLu – I will never ask you to kiss me through the phone. Or the blog, for that matter. Who knows what kind of damage you could do to your computer.

    Andhari – I’m not sure why he said it, but I figure if I do work there I’ll have plenty of awesome stories about the guy to tell everyone on the internets.

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